Star-Crossed
It's date night. Light the scented candles, warm up the oils, and deal the tarot cards. Will the stars align, or will I be damned? "
O.J. and Coffee to Go
Let's see what's in the news this week, shall we? Oh god...oh no...oh that's horrible...the humanity! Sorry, that was just the h
The Mountain Between Us
This October, a mountain falls in love with two humans and cums between them. Kate Winslet must decide between a meat popsicle and a rock.
Welcome to the Hotel California
Flag on the field: looks like Father Shmuck is challenging the call. Ruling: Trump is mad about something else again. 4-year penalty.
EDITORIAL: Nazi Lives Matter
Our first letter-to-the-editor: A white supremacist gives his firsthand account of the events of Charlottesville, Virginia. There's hate
What's a Force Majeure, Daddy?
Forget the storm brewing from out the ocean. How about the storm brewing from out our own culture climate? Father Shmuck says if you wanna b
Contact, Vol. IV
Turns out aliens are not so different from you and I; they hate clowns just as much as we do.
Big Deal, Another Disappointing Blowjob
Father Shmuck gives us breaking news from the eye of Irma. Yes, Irma is not the storm of the century as promised, but this is certainly the
Been a Day
Hi fellas, I'm very down-to-earth, chill, and super fun. I only go to the gym and collect nuts for the winter time. I can only eat food
Doubling-Down on a Triple-Threat
Is this a thing? I can't even. Father Shmuck examines how you do you and say dumb shit. Drain the swamp and leak the lizard 'cause i